Friday, January 29, 2010

Operation Grommet A Success

Sometimes the News is Strange:

So imagine you are in the Capalaba Police Station a few years ago and a complaint was made. You and some of your fellow officers get together in a meeting room with some bad coffee and a few donuts.

Whiteboard - check
Whiteboard marker - check

brainstorm people.. What are we going to call this thing..

I know boss - Operation Grommet

Grommets and eyelets are metal, plastic, or rubber rings that are inserted into a hole made through another material. They may be used to reinforce the hole, to shield something from the sharp edges of the hole, or both.

OK we have a name.. off we go.

The result:

'Get help', nude tradesman told

A bayside cabinet maker who exposed his penis and masturbated in front of female clients while renovating their home kitchens has been ordered to seek help by a Brisbane magistrate.

English-born Mark Stephen Owen, proprietor of Capalaba-based Mark's Kitchen Makeovers, admitted to engaging in the "bizarre behaviour" at the homes of seven women over nearly a decade, between 1999 and 2008.

He would flash at his victims by deliberately allowing himself to be exposed in shorts and tight pants.

He masturbated in the homes of three women, often calling the women into the kitchen area where he was working and smiling at them when they realised what he was doing.

and how did we end up with Grommet?

Mr Shillito also sought the forfeiture of "penis rings" worn by Owen during the offences and confiscated by police.

"He did wear them to work with the intention of enlarging his genitals," Mr Shillito said.

Mr Chowdhury said his client wanted the items back, but Magistrate Noel Nunan granted the forfeiture order.

"I think he can do without them ... so he won't be tempted again," he said.

That dear reader is Police work at it's best.


Jayne said...

I have a horrible suspicion he may be a wanker I briefly worked with over 20 yrs ago. The name, place of birth and age fit *shudder*.

dam buster said...

jayne your use of the term 'wanker' appears appropriate in this situation!

Margarita Milonguita said...

Where is thumbkin?

dam buster said...

thumbkin Mags?

Margarita Milonguita said...

I meant you- haven't heard from you in a while!

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